Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
Randomize
