On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
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