It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize
