Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
Did you just see the Batmobile???
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Randomize
