will power is for people who don't want to get laid
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
Randomize
