omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
Randomize
