she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
Randomize