C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
Randomize
