he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
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