He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
Randomize
