You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
I honestly don't understand how your night went from singing a touching rendition of Africa to an angry political rant to low key trying to find a frat boy to bang to doing dishes to yoga
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Randomize
