I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
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