Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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