As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
Randomize
