In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
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