Just fell off a train. Bad.
im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
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