I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
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