Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
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