I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize