Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
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