Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize