He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Randomize
