Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize