The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
