in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
Randomize
