Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
