I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
i out mim tonsoeep
Randomize
