no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize