Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
you had me at cake vodka
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
Randomize
