Jerry, you need to find god
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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