seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
Randomize
