Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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