Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
I puked a lego.
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
Randomize
