Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
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