Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
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