your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
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