Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Randomize
