didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
Go christen that room with your naked body.
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
Randomize
