Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
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