she was so not down for the gang bang
She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
