Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Randomize
