she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Randomize
