She's JV to your varsity
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
