I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
