Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
You're earring is so big in my mouth
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize