Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
Randomize
