we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
Randomize
