Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
You were sitting at the bus stop holding hands with some Polish girl you just met, who was just as drunk as you were, and you kept trying to light your Kit Kat and smoke it.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
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