did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
