Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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