i was born a porn star she said
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
Randomize
