dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
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